If you’re not really sure they have a problem: Letting someone know that their abusive behaviors are not invisible to others can be an effective measure in helping an adult stay safe from crossing the line with a child. Some adults do not understand fully what behavior is appropriate with children...
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There is no such thing as a “typical sex offender.” It can be hard to understand how seemingly ordinary people can have sexual thoughts or behaviors towards children. There is also no usual “pathway” to becoming someone who sexually abuses children. People who sexually abuse children can be any...
It can be hard to understand what causes someone to sexually abuse a child. Just as there is no such thing as a “typical sex offender”, there is no one pathway to becoming someone who sexually abuses children. Treatment providers have said the one thing people who sexually abuse children are most...
Asking for help breaks the isolation The reasons why some adults think of behaving sexually with a child are complex. In fact, most adults who have sexual fantasies about children may find these thoughts worrisome – and they don’t want to harm a child. There is a lot of shame, stigma, and fear...
Decide first if it is safe for you to have a conversation When your safety is at risk, it is simply not an option to speak directly with the person whom you know or suspect has abused a child, particularly in situations of domestic violence. In such instances it’s advisable to speak with a domestic...
Treatment for people who have sexually abused is different than other therapy for adults
Not everything you share with a therapist can be kept confidential. What an individual tells his or her therapist is confidential; however, there are limitations to the confidentiality between a therapist and a client. Laws in all 50 states require a therapist to contact authorities if a patient is...
Not knowing what might happen next makes it hard to reach out for help Sometimes people who have been sexual with children are afraid to reach out for help because they don't know what might happen to them or their family. Child sexual abuse is a crime and must be dealt with through the child...
Decide first if it is safe for you to have a conversation When your safety is at risk, it is simply not an option to speak directly with the person whom you know or suspect has abused a child, particularly in situations of domestic violence. In such instances it’s advisable to speak with a domestic...
Many people who sexually abuse children have shared that they had sexual thoughts or fantasies about children before they ever acted on those thoughts and feelings. And, many people who have sexual thoughts or fantasies about children never act on those thoughts or feelings. Sexual thoughts or...
Get help before you act on your sexual thoughts or feelings towards children. Even though it may be hard to tell someone you are having sexual thoughts or feelings towards children, it will be much harder to get help after you have harmed a child. Find someone you can talk with about your feelings...
Now is the time to seek help. If you know someone who is having sexual thoughts about children or who feels sexually aroused by a child’s presence, this is the time to seek help. It is important to that they take steps now to keep themselves from being sexual in the presence of a child. With...
“I was in a lot of pain... My big concern was that nobody knew what I did. I didn't want anybody to know I was a pedophile. I thought, "That's the bottom of the totem pole," not realizing that the only way I was NOT going to be a pedophile for life was to get help and to learn to change myself...
Stop It Now! has a confidential toll-free Helpline (1.888.PREVENT). If you are concerned about your sexualized thoughts or behaviors towards children, you can call the Stop It Now! confidential, toll-free Helpline at 1.888.PREVENT (1.888.773.8368). No caller ID is used on this line. Get access to...
It is very hard to predict how the person who has abused will respond. Once the adult or youth who has been harmful is aware that this behavior has been exposed, they may experience a number of different reactions. These reactions can range from fear and remorse to outright denial. It is important...
If you are someone whose sexual thoughts or behaviors about children concern you, and/or put children at risk for sexual abuse, there is help available for you so that no child is harmed. Stop It Now! asks all adults to be accountable and take responsibility for their behavior. When an adult who is...
Child Molestation Research and Prevention Institute (CMRPI) Book list for parents, professionals, adults with sexual behavior concerns, adults sexually abused as children and their partners. The Safer Society Foundation Free catalog specializing in sexual abuse prevention and treatment publications.
Someone you care about may be acting in ways that worry or confuse you. The behaviors below may indicate a possible risk of sexual abuse to a child, but may also be a way for this adult to ask for help. Many people with sexual behavior problems believe that others already suspect and often wish...
Safety Planning in the Moment: For Adults Who Feel At-Risk to Harm a Child When you’re reaching out for help to stay safe from engaging in inappropriate or abusive behavior, Stop It Now! understands that you may not always be in a safe place. Sometimes, due to life circumstances, you may already be...