Child sexual abuse includes the following touching behaviors. Touching a child's genitals (penis, testicles, vulva, breasts, or anus) for sexual pleasure or to meet the needs of the older child or adult. Making a child touch someone else's genitals, or playing sexual ("pants-down") games. Putting objects or body parts (like fingers, tongue or a penis) inside the vulva or vagina, in the mouth, or in the anus of a child for sexual pleasure or to meet the needs of the older child or adult.
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Child sexual abuse can also include behaviors that do not involve touching or physical contact. These behaviors can be just as upsetting and emotionally harmful to a child as some touching behaviors. Non-touching behaviors that are considered to be child sexual abuse include: Showing pornography to...
Child sexual abuse can be a very confusing topic, both to adults and to children. Below are six clarifications of common misunderstandings many adults have articulated on our Helpline while attempting to make sense out of confusing situations. Child sexual abuse does not have to involve physical...
It can be hard to acknowledge that all of us, even children, are sexual beings, have sexual feelings and are curious about sex and sexuality. Children’s curiosity can lead to exploring their own and each other’s body parts by looking and touching. They may peek when family members are in the...
There is no such thing as a “typical sex offender.” It can be hard to understand how seemingly ordinary people can have sexual thoughts or behaviors towards children. There is also no usual “pathway” to becoming someone who sexually abuses children. People who sexually abuse children can be any...
Thoughts come before action Many people who have sexually abused children report they had sexual thoughts or fantasies about children before they ever acted on them. On the other hand, many people who have sexual thoughts or fantasies about children never act on those thoughts or feelings. Sexual...
It can be hard to understand what causes someone to sexually abuse a child. Just as there is no such thing as a “typical sex offender”, there is no one pathway to becoming someone who sexually abuses children. Treatment providers have said the one thing people who sexually abuse children are most...
Behavioral warning signs of possible child sexual abuse Any one sign doesn't mean the child was abused, but the presence of several suggests you begin asking questions and consider seeking help. Keep in mind that some of these signs can emerge at other times of stress such as: During a divorce...
Someone you care about may be acting in ways that worry or confuse you. The behaviors below could indicate a possible risk that they may sexually abuse a child, but may also be a way for this adult to ask for help. Many people with sexual behavior problems believe that others already suspect they are crossing a line and often wish someone would ask what’s going on or advise them where to go to get help. Remember, you can start a conversation by pointing out harmful impacts on a child without accusing someone of abusive intentions.
Physical signs Although most children who have been sexually abused do not have physical symptoms, if your child complains of or has unexplained bruises, redness, bleeding, sores, or milky fluids in or around the genitals, anus or mouth, you need to bring your child to a doctor for a physical exam...
Children are by nature vulnerable to those more powerful than they are. Sexual abuse does not occur because of a particular quality in the child, but solely because of traits or decisions made on the part of the person abusing. Yet, if we can understand why some children may be more likely to be...
Sometimes the decision to file is not easy It’s scary to think that making a phone call could change our lives. We can’t know beforehand what will happen after we file. We don’t know if our report will lead to a child getting protection or possibly make things difficult for the child. Sometimes the...
All children are curious about sex. The more children know about their own sexuality, the less likely it is that others will take advantage of them because of their lack of knowledge. Having ongoing conversations with children and teens about their own developing sexuality is an important part of...
"I have mixed feelings about filing." More often, concerns lie in a “gray area” of vague uneasiness, sketchy details or uncertainty about what is actually happening. The decision to file a report regarding child abuse of any kind is almost always complicated by the reporter’s relationship to the...
Touching and Non-Touching Behaviors
If you are thinking of speaking up about a possible situation of child sexual abuse, you may face practical concerns of how this will impact your family. Here are answers to some common questions people face when deciding how to take action on concerning behaviors. How will my relationships survive...
"Does my child really have to talk to someone in order to get better?" The effects of child sexual abuse are complex and vary from child to child For most children who have been abused, getting help from a specialized professional with a background in working with children who have been sexually...
What stops us from seeing abuse? It’s very disturbing to imagine that someone you know could be sexually harming a child. Without certain proof of abuse, it’s so much easier to dismiss such thoughts or to think you’re overreacting. You may also be worried about the possible consequences of taking...
Anyone may file a report In all states in the US any person concerned for the welfare or safety of a child can voluntarily file a report. You do not have to be in a professional relationship with a family to contact Child Protective Services (CPS) or police on behalf of a child. Remarkably, some...
Usually the identity of the person who filed the report remains confidential. Typically CPS and/or police do not share information with anybody about the progress of an investigation – even with a protective parent. This can feel frustrating, especially if the process is moving slowly. Reports are...
There are many possibilities for what might cause inappropriate sexual behavior of a child to another. People are often surprised to learn that, in fact, over a third of all sexual abuse of children is committed by someone under the age of 18 who usually is a family member. Children may engage in...
Can a child be charged criminally for sexual behavior? Children can be legally charged for criminal sexual conduct. The laws in each state vary, but in some cases children can be charged criminally for sexual behaviors with other children. Depending on the severity of the activity, the behavior...
No, most children who have been sexually abused do NOT go on to sexually abuse children Just as there is no such thing as a typical “sexual abuser” there is no such thing as a typical “victim.” How children process the experience of having been sexually abused varies widely and depends on many...
It’s hard to believe Although it is sometimes hard to believe that someone we know or love is capable of sexually harming a child, we must remember that children rarely lie about sexual abuse. It is highly unlikely that a child would deliberately make false accusations about adult-like sexual...