Tip Sheet: Twelve Questions About Your Behavior Only You Can Answer

Do you need help?

If you are wondering about your own sexual thoughts and behaviors toward children, we encourage you to answer these questions honestly. They are designed to help you decide whether you may need help. Take a few minutes to ask yourself the following twelve questions.

If you answer ‘yes’ to more than one question, we encourage you to seek help from a professional. Please visit our Online Help Center for information, guidance and referrals. You can also email, call or find out more (including our available phone hours) on Get Help Now! page.

Answer YES or NO to the Following Questions:

  1. Have you ever felt a sexual attraction to children or underage teenagers (a boy or girl 17 years old or younger)?

  2. Have you kept secrets from others about your attractions to children or underage teens?

  3. Have you looked at or purchased pornography that showed children or underage teens?

  4. Have you ever secretly watched children or underage teens (window peeping or voyeurism) or exposed yourself (exhibitionism) to children or underage teens?

  5. Have you bought children or underage teens gifts, offered favors, or given them money in order to get them to trust you and like you? If so, were you hopeful that you could touch them sexually, or get sexual good feelings from them?

  6. Have you shown pornography (or material that is sexual in nature) to children or underage teens, or intentionally left it where they could find it?

  7. Have you ever told yourself "age is just a number" or "he/she is mature for his/her age" or something similar to make yourself feel better about your sexual thoughts or behaviors toward children or underage teens?

  8. Have you ever wanted to stop either looking at child pornography or sexually fantasizing about touching children or underage teens -- but did it again?

  9. Do you find that romantic/sexual fantasies about, or sexual behavior toward, children or underage teens interfere with your relationships at home or work?

  10. Does your sexual attraction to children or underage teens conflict with your spiritual beliefs or moral values?

  11. Has your sexual attraction to children ever left you feeling worried, frightened, ashamed, hopeless, different, alienated from others, or suicidal?

  12. Have you ever felt that your life would be better if you were not sexually attracted to children or underage teens?

How You Can Find Confidential Help

Stop It Now!'s Online Help Center is  a private, 24/7 online resource for people with concerns or questions about child sexual abuse.  No personally identifiable information is required to get answers through the Online Help Center. The Online Help Center offers specialized information related to your situation, customized guidance on how to talk with others about your concerns, and lists of organizations that offer services to help you cope.

If you still have questions, you can call the Stop It Now! confidential, toll-free Helpline at 1.888.PREVENT to talk to a trained professional. No caller ID is used on this line. Call for available hours.

If you are thinking about sexual interactions with a child, our Online Help Center and Helpline can assist you in finding the help you need to keep yourself and children safe. If you have already sexually abused a child or if you are unsure about whether what you have done is illegal, these services will help you learn about taking steps to stop and be able to take responsibility for your behavior.

Share Prevention Tip Sheets in Your Community

We encourage you to print and share these tip sheets in your family and community.  Our tip sheets are licensed under the Creative Commons, which allows you to reproduce them as long as you follow these Guidelines. Please contact us about permissions and to tell us how you plan to put our resources to work. 

For more information and guidance, please visit our Online Help Center.